In tune with the mind: Decluttering for your mental health
By Nqoba M Sibenke
Research has shown that physical clutter harms our mental wellbeing. A disorganized environment, and chaotic affects cognition, and decision-making and even impact our mood 1. Clutter has also been associated with mental health issues such as depression, anxiety and stress. As such, decluttering has been proven to have a positive influence on our mental health, reducing stress and negative emotions, boosting self-confidence and esteem, and enhancing heightened motivation and productivity 2.
And so the decluttering process can start in our physical spaces. We have lots of stuff that we are keeping that we need to get rid of – in our wardrobes piles of clothes that we are no longer in need of yet we could give away to those in need. I’ve come across old pots in my mother’s cupboards and I am sure many are still holding on to pots and plates that are no longer in use. Maybe if we clear up our cupboards and create more space it will also help us to clear up our minds. There’s a lot that we are holding onto; old carpets, and old furniture that is breaking down, our spaces are so congested and so is our mind space.
In the physical space, clutter takes up more space and leaves no space for new furniture or property. Similarly, mental clutter congests the mind and prevents us from new experiences. For some of us, trauma is the clutter that we are still holding onto. It might be childhood trauma or recent trauma. Trauma brings with it anxiety, fear, anger, mood swings and all other mental baggage. Imagine moving around with such a load of negativity.
Trauma repels positive relationships and experiences, it deprives us of enjoying life as we should. And this is why we should offload trauma before the year ends. One of the best ways of offloading trauma is therapy. Therapy will help us to develop coping mechanisms to deal with the triggers. Therapy also helps us to manage our emotions and be able to manage our situations.
As part of decluttering, we need to deal with toxic relationships and partnerships. Toxic relationships are not just limited to romantic relationships but also extend to friendships. By definition a toxic relationship is “a relationship characterized by harmful, damaging, and destructive patterns of behaviour. It can be romantic, familial, friendship, or professional”. Such relationships exhibit abusive and manipulative characteristics, lack of respect and overstepping boundaries, emotional abuse, manipulation, emotional unavailability, and a train of unpleasant experiences. Toxic relationships leave us feeling wretched and useless. They reduce our self-image and self-esteem and lead to conditions like depression, anxiety, trust issues and lack of confidence. We need to surround ourselves with positive relationships and support systems, people who appreciate us and value us, and people who bring out the best in us. Moving away is a choice that we can make. It’s time to get up, dust ourselves and start a fresh new journey.
We have feelings that we have bottled up for so long, feelings that make us angry, bitter and irritable. We also ruminate, yes I said ruminate. Rumination is the process of re-chewing food, in mental health spaces it refers to repetitive negative thinking patterns where we fish out past regrets, disappointments, thoughts, and experiences and we re-live them. This compromises not only our mental but also our physical well-being. It also affects our relationships with the people around us as well as intimate relationships. People who ruminate often suffer from anxiety and stress. It is time to let go. Journaling is an excellent way of expressing our feelings. Write about it. If there is a way of saying it out, this is the chance. Find someone to talk to and share your frustrations and negative experiences. This will help you to release the pressure.
It has always been said that we are our own enemies. Negative self-talk is one way that we sabotage ourselves. We focus on our weaknesses and we tell ourselves that we are not good enough. Sometimes we compare ourselves with the next person and fail to see our real value. This creates clutter in our minds and we need to remove it. We have to affirm ourselves and practice self-compassion. This will go a long way in promoting our mental health.
There are habits that we have developed which are unhealthy, unproductive and destructive. It is time for us to deal with these habits. Procrastination, lack of punctuality, laziness, self-sabotaging, and indecision, are all things that we have to offload if we desire a happy new year.
Here are steps that can help us in the process of decluttering;
- Identify your mental clutter
- Let go of negative thoughts
- Manage mental distractions
- Deal with the triggers
- Apply techniques such as journaling, boundary setting, prioritization to deal with the clutter
- Reflect and Adjust
It is not too late to make important changes in our lives. Prioritising our mental health will go a long way in 2025.
Nqoba Sibenke is registered with AHPCZ as an intern Counselling Psychologist and can be reached at [email protected]