‘My foster carers were from a different culture but treated me like their daughter’
Growing up with her biological family, Lucinda Marvilha missed a lot of school to visit her home country of Portugal.
When she was suddenly taken into care at the age of nine, she remembers feeling surprised and shocked, but adapted quickly to her new life.
After a night in emergency foster placement, she was taken to the home of her foster parents and although it was initially meant to be a temporary placement of around six weeks, she ended up living with them until she was 18.
“My foster parents were very different from my biological family as we are from different cultures – I am from a Portuguese background and they are from a British background,” Lucinda tells i.
“Despite that, they made me feel welcome from the start through their own traditions. They are practising Christians and I didn’t get brought up by that. They never forced me into what they believed, but included me if I was comfortable. Christmas was one of those things.
“I grew up quite poor and never had all the luxuries they were able to provide for me, like presents and making the house feel warm and welcome with Christmas trees and decorations.
“I appreciated both cultures and am lucky to have Christmases in different ways. My foster parents had their own daughter who was four years older than me and I got on well with her. They treated me the same as their biological daughter.”
Lucinda says the biggest difference going into foster care made to her life was to her education. With the support and dedication of her foster parents and her own determination, she went from not being able to read very well to thriving.
“I wasn’t able to read very well when I was in Year 5 and there’s only so much schools can do to help because you’re in a class of 30 pupils.
“My foster carers are fortunately very highly educated and both went to university.
“They spent a lot of time on the way to school and the way back from school going over the basics I had missed out on and doing reading and times tables with me.
“Luckily, I am a lifelong learner and I wanted to do well. I had that drive and perseverance and with the education my foster carers provided, I was able to do well.
“When I was in sixth form studying for my A Levels, I worked really hard so I could go to university, and they provided me with tuition for one of my subjects so I could achieve the best grades I was capable of.
“I wouldn’t have been able to get to university if it wasn’t for my foster parents.”
Lucinda, who is now 26 and lives in north London, went to University of Sunderland to do a combined degree in dance and Spanish, and achieved a First. She says it wasn’t plain sailing and her foster carers were there to support her through the tougher times.
After graduating, she studied for a postgraduate certificate in education and she is now living with her foster carers again whle working as a private online tutor.
“My relationship with my foster carers is just as good as it was when I was growing up,” she says. “They support me if I have any problems and are always there for me.
“For them, I am their family and I can call or text them as often as I need and we go out to places together. They treat me like their own daughter.”
Lucinda was aware of the charity Become, which supports children in care and young care leavers, when she was growing up in care as she received regular newsletters from them.
She has been involved with a number of projects with Become and is an accredited young trainer with them, as well as using her experience of care to help with their campaigns.
i launched its Christmas appeal to support Become with the goal of urging readers to donate to raise £150,000. Thanks to your generosity, the appeal has now surpassed £165,000, but there is still time to donate so Become can help more young people.
Lucinda says: “Become help young people even after they’ve left care and through them, I found out about a lot of things that social workers hadn’t told me while growing up in care such as about applying for council housing or social housing.
“Become is a very genuine charity and its work is through the real life experiences of young people who grew up in care. Young people share their experiences if they are comfortable and Become uses this for everyone’s advantage.”
How to donate
i has launched its 2023 Christmas Appeal “Together We Care” urging generous readers to raise money to help Become give vital advice and practical support to 1,300 children in care and young care leavers.
We initially set a fundraising target of £75,000 but thanks to the generosity of i readers, we now hope to raise £150,000 for the charity.
Click here to read more about what Become does:
Here’s what your donation can provide:
- £2.50 sends a handwritten Christmas card to a child in care.
- £5 helps a child in care stay in touch with brothers or sisters living apart from them.
- £12 gives Christmas dinner to a young person who recently left care.
- £25 gives a Christmas present to a child in care or young care leaver.
- £45 pays for a young person to travel to Parliament to share their story with interested MPs.
- £50 pays for employment coaching to help someone leaving care find a job.
- £75 provides one-to-one guidance for a young person applying to university.
Click here to donate: www.becomecharity.org.uk/i-appeal
